No, I'm not talking about Christmas ..... the kids are going back to school in two days!!!!

I have been Chief Referee for six weeks and I'm exhausted.

"She started it"

"No, HE started it"

"She hit me"

"He hit me first"

"Either you both shut up or I'll crack your heads together" ... nice to know I can keep my cool ...

I have my schedule carefully planned. Sleep for the first two days, then hire a skip and a bulldozer and clean up the house post-holiday (that really should read post-apocolypse). And is it in a Rule Book somewhere that says kids MUST grow out of their uniform the week before they are due to go back?

Up a size in shoes each, up a clothing size (or in his case, 2 sizes) and apparently it is "stig" to have the same backpack as last year.  Brand names which were so necessary last year (LaCoste, Reebok etc) are a definite no-no this year. New stationery, underwear, trainers ... flippin EVERYTHING!!!

*goes to plant fresh money tree in back garden* 

Awww - shoot me NOW!!!!!