It's been a while since I've blogged. Part of the
reason is because I wasn't really sure I had anything worthwhile to say.
Part of the reason is because I've been really focused on preparing for the
launch of our new site. Today, as I was reflecting on some things and
thinking about my week, I decided it would be nice to blog a bit and share some
of the things I've been thinking about.
I must say that this last 12 months has been unlike any I've ever
experienced. Prior to November of last year I had only attend 5 or maybe 6
funerals in my entire 30 year life. However, since last November I have
attended 6. There were 2 or 3 others
that I was unable to attend for one reason or another. As I write this my heart
is heavy with thoughts of a friend who is very likely spending her last few
weeks with her husband. They are a couple I consider young. In fact,
of the 8 or 9 funerals that have surrounded me in the last 12 months, at least 4
of them have been for people under the age of 60. At least 3 of those
were for people under 50.
It breaks my heart. Death is never easy for those left behind. It
always hurts for those who bury their loved ones. Even when the one who
passed away is elderly and has battled a long illness, death's sting is painful
for those who remain.
As I consider the difficulty my friend must be going through as her husband
suffers through this difficult disease, I am frustrated that life can be cut so
short. Why have I seen so many lives taken so young? I know God is
near to these families, but wouldn't it be better to let these families grow
old together? Why do so many have to die young? Why has it happened
to so many people I know?
I've pondered these thoughts over and over many times during the last two
months. I've gotten angry. I've cried. I've told other's
about my frustration. I've asked God to answer my confusion.
Here's what I know (and it's not much). God is good. That's
it. I have no doubt about that fact. My faith in Him has not
faltered one bit. Even though I don't understand why things happen, I do
know that I don't understand much, and I am certainly not God.
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own
understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your
paths." Proverbs 3:5-6
These words tell me that I don't have to understand, I just have to
trust. A good friend reminded me of these words this week. As I
meditated on His word, I had a realization. Job lost all 10 of his
children in a matter of moments. His response: "The Lord gave and
the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised." He
later said, "Though He slay me, yet will I hope in Him."
I was reminded of how the story of Job ends. In the end the Lord gives
him 10 more children. This part of the story caused me to see a new side
of life. You see, I was focusing on all the negative and sad parts of
life. In the same 12 months I have also seen some close friends of mine
celebrate the birth of perfectly healthy twins! The doctors said it was
impossible for them to have children, but God knew better. I also saw 4
of the most beautiful children who were living in an abusive and depriving home
and in danger of being passed around by society adopted into a family of love
and nurture. I have seen those children grow and thrive in their new
home. And I have seen another couple give birth to a very premature baby
and yet the child is strong, healthy and has had nearly no medical issues from
the day he was born.
You see, God is good. He is the giver of life. He is the lover of
our souls.
Do we always understand? No. Do we always like the cards life deals
us? No. Do we always have a God who is full of compassion and whose
mercies are new every day? Yes! Yes! Yes!
So I'll take the good and I'll praise God for it. And I'll take the bad
and I'll thank God for the time we had with those who are now gone. And
maybe, just maybe it will cause me to appreciate new life more and make the
most of what I still have.