The anniversary of the fatal attacks of 9/11 bring with it the individual memories of where each of us were that day. Photographs of the World Trade Center still brings tears immediately to my eyes. Most of us were nowhere near New York, Washington, or Pennsylvania when  thousands of people lost their lives. Most of us did not intimately know any of those who died. My heart aches for those of you who lost loved ones.

This posting I offer out of respect for survivors and the memory of the victims. Please share your story as well.

The morning of September 11th I was running late to school. Specifically I was missing my college course entitled "Islamic Religions". I had stayed the night at a friend's apartment. My friend and I got into my car only to find a police car parked in the driveway, blocking our only exit. The police car was not running. No keys in the ignition. There were no police in sight. Assuming the officer was perhaps inside one of the many surrounding apartments, I blared my horn repeatedly to no avail. We had no choice but to wait so I turned on my radio. It was tuned to the local college radio station, WIDR, known for it's somewhat obscure musical line-up. I couldn't understand what was on the radio station. Some weird War Of The Worlds type thing I joked. I dismissed it as some station antic and shut it off, irritated. My friend decided to knock on some doors to find the police officer responsible for our continued delay. I waited in the car. Again I turned the radio on. Same bizzare broadcast on WIDR. I turned the station. Same broadcast, a male voice, coming through strained and broken. Sentance fragments. A plane. A building. I must have turned to several more stations. My friend returned to the car. I said "Something is happening, listen". We sat in shock and in silence. Mostly we listened, confused. We decided to give up on getting to school, the police car was still blocking our exit and we wanted to get to the TV. Surely this could not be on TV, whatever it was. If it was not on TV it could not be real. Surely we had missed the punchline.

Through the fuzz of the old TV the first images came alive. A building, smoking wildly on the New York skyscape. Having no phone, my friend asked the neighboors to call the police about the car in the drive. They were sending someone out. It was not supposed to be there. We waited. We watched the TV standing. Images of people, of smoke, of fire. What a terrible accident. How does a plane smash into a building? Must have been some mechanical failure. Something that made the plane uncontrollable.

The police arrived at the apartment. Questioned us while we all watched television. Many police. All around the house. And the fire and smoke on the TV growing. Then the second plane hit. A second plane? Not possible. Not an accident. The police car had been stolen the previous night and abandoned in the drive. And there were buildings on fire, planes obliterated. New York. Washington. And another plane somewhere else, crashing into the ground. I stood quitely crying in front of the TV. The yard filling with police. The world had ended somehow, on a regular day.

It was hours before the tow truck came for the police car and the officers left. I called my mother from a payphone. Did she know too? Did she know this thing was happening? She knew. My sensible mother knew. This is real. We told each other how much we loved each other. We did not know where else the danger was. It could be us. It could always be us next.

In the days and weeks that followed I remember being in the Islamic Religions class. There were many Muslim students in the class. We talked and we argued. I was surprised at how we argued. We were in a class designed to help us understand each other. But there it was, out in the open. The rage, the fear, the hate and distrust all ripped open in that classroom. It was clear we did not understand each other at all. We thought our expensive educations, our mountains of books and articles, our wildly intelligent proffesser, would save us from the perils of ignorance. They did not. The class fell apart. We eventually returned to the syllabus. We read the assigned books. We took the tests. We stopped talking to each other.

All commercial flights were grounded that day. And the next, I think. I remember thinking, how strange. The sky is empty today. Only war planes there now. No one going on vacation. No one coming home.

The sky is empty.

A: Most likely no, it has not been switched. Diamond-swapping is very uncommon but not unheard of (unfortunately). My grandfather used to say "I've never seen a diamond worth switching." That's because a reputable jeweler knows she or he will have to move the whole family to an island and never be seen again if they try something so horribly stupid. It is more likely that you use well water. Well water contains minerals that affix to diamond and will not come off with anything you have at home. Your jeweler can use a light acid bath commonly called a "pickle" to remove these deposits. You may have to leave it overnight as some of these deposits are stubborn. Pickling twice a year will battle this yellowing and will do no harm to your diamond.

Jewelry is made from mostly soft and delicate materials. Your new diamond engagement ring set in gold will not last to see your 10th anniversary unless you treat it properly. Diamonds DO chip and crack and get dirty! Gold and even platinum is soft enough to mold into all those beautiful things we love. That means it's also soft enough to bend and scratch while doing the laundry, dishes, even typing on the computer. 

I find I cannot be terribly nice about this. I have seen jewelry with things LIVING in it. So allow me to be frank about this topic because it will keep your jewelry at it's best.

In the morning: Do not wear perfume on areas where your jewelry comes into contact with your skin. That perfume will still be on your jewelry tomorrow and, trust me, it will not smell the same. Put your hairspray on before your jewelry. You may as well just wear cubic zirconias rather than diamond stud earrings because diamonds look dull with a coat of hairspray. Put your jewelry on last. This will keep it out of contact with your cosmetics as much as possible.

During the day: Do not put hand lotion on without first taking off your rings. This is the #1 reason your rings look dirty. And TRUST ME, under a microscope they ARE. Hand lotion, dead skin, and dirt builds up under the space between your finger and ring and gets crammed under the prongs. This build up can actually lead to skin dermatitus that causes your finger to become red and raw. Keeping dirty jewelry on is not only bad for the jewelry it is also not hygenic. Don't prepare food with your rings on. Don't do the dishes or the laundry either.  Diamonds LOVE grease. That's why they use grease belts to mine them. Diamonds will hold onto grease until you give them a good soak and scrub.

In the evening: Get into the habit of taking off your jewelry as soon as you walk in the door. Put it in the same place every time to avoid losing it. The less you wear your jewelry the longer it will last. And yes, I do mean your wedding ring too! A band can be left on as long as it is thick, solid, and has no stones. But take it off once a week to soak it well and clean your finger. Your wedding ring with diamonds is like a germ and grime trap. Being sentimental by never taking it off is not sweet, it's gross. And you are not doing your jewelry any favors by leaving it on all the time.

If you follow my advice, however unpopular it may be, you will avoid much of the usual wear and tear including damaged or missing gems, bent and broken prongs and precious metal wear. Have your jewelry professionally checked and cleaned at least twice a year. Many jewelrs will do this for free and it's worth stopping in to have done.Wear your jewelry and enjoy it but treat it with care and respect!

For more on cleaning your jewelry there are some helpful tips in my previous blog about Patina on Vintage/Antique Jewelry.

Thanks to Wendy for her excellent question:

Q: Will removing patina on antique jewelry lower the value?

A: Patina is a good thing as long as you are collecting furniture. Antique and vintage jewelry maintains it's best value when it is closest to it's original appearance. Unless you're dealing with the crown jewels or a museum-quality Mayan gold headress it's pretty safe to assume that a properly cleaned piece of jewelry is more beautiful and thus more valuable than it's counterpart that is caked with old hand lotion and body powder. Think about it this way: You have a solid silver service set that hasn't been polished in 100 years. You brush away the patina with a bit of Semichrome (excellent product for jewelry too) and WOW you've got a gorgeous set of spoons, forks etc. that you can actually use and that will exact a higher selling price. On the other hand, say you've got a set of plated silver service items that needs some cleaning. You dip it in Tarnex and...ooops, you've just removed half the plating and now you have a service set that looks as if it's been for a spin in the garbage disposal. Now you have an ugly, unusable service set that will cost you several hundred dollars to replate.

It's the same with jewelry. The lesson is; clean what needs to be cleaned and only using the proper method. First, know what materials you are dealing with and how to clean them. Here are some examples of materials and how to clean them:

Solid gold: Soak in jewelry cleaner for a few minutes, or if you want to save some cash, mix an ammonia-based all-purpose cleaner (I use Mr.Clean) and mix it with water 1:4 (1 part cleaner, 4 parts water). Brush with the little brush that comes with the jewelry cleaner or use a soft toothbrush. Follow up with a jewelry-buffing cloth. These cloths have a small amount of the polish used by jewelers with a buffing machine. These cloths are usually available at your local jeweler. My absolute favorite is the one made by Stuller. They are a bit more expensive but last longer and don't dry out like traditional cloths. By using light cleaning and buffing you will remove tarnish and general gunk without harm.

Solid silver: Never assume it's safe to use a dip product like Tarnex or silver jewelry dip. It's best to use the method above. Having said that, I admit to using dip all the time! When you have as much silver to deal with as I do it is simply too time consuming to hand polish everything. The results depend on the item. If you insist on being lazy like me, understand that you may sometimes have poor results. Dip the item into the cleaner and check it after 10 seconds. If it's starting to look duller pull it out and rinse immediately. If it's looking better, leave in in for another 20 seconds and rinse. You may have to repeat this several times before the serious grime is gone. After a good rinse, use a polishing cloth to remove any remnants and bring up a nice polish. If you have a newer silver item it may be plated with rhodium to prevent tarnishing. If you dip a rhodium-plated piece it will eat off the rhodium and leave it looking dull and, well, pretty ugly. Polish it with a polishing cloth until the shine comes back. Most jewelers can re-rhodium silver (or gold; rhodium is used on almost all new white gold to make it look more white than white gold actually is) but it can be expensive because of the cost of rhodium (more than platinum costs in pure form!).

Diamonds and Gemstones: Diamonds can be cleaned in jewelry cleaner no matter what the age. Emeralds, sapphires, rubies, cubic zirconia, and most semi-precious stones (aquamarine, garnet, amethyst, topaz etc.) can be cleaned in the same manner but DO NOT soak them in cleaner. It's best to give them a quick dip, a gentle scrub, and a good rinse. DO NOT EVER soak pearls, opals, anything glued into the item, any item that has antiquing (the dark recessed areas), mother of pearl, other shell, coral, ivory, fake pearl, ivory etc., or foil-back rhinestones. There are "delicate" jewelry cleaners on the market for pearls, opals, and such but I never use them and never recommend them. Pearl and opal are porous like sponges. Pearls have an outer coating that is very delicate and can easily be worn or chipped off. You may soak pearls in mineral water and buff them clean and dry with a soft cloth (no polishing cloths!) but understand that this will break down the silk that they are strung on or the adhesive used to mount them. I do not soak pearls unless I am about to restring them. Pearls love your natural body oil. When you wear them you should avoid putting lotion or perfume near where they fall on your neck. Opals are made of silica and the areas between the silica molecules will wick up moisture and expand. So keep your opal ring out of the shower and sink. If you have an item with these NO-SOAK materials that really needs cleaning just take your time and protect those materials. Keep them safe from cleaners and away from polishing cloths by covering them with a bit of that super-sticky saran wrap. Or just avoid making contact with those areas alltogether. I can't stress enough the importance of the polishing cloth. They are gentle and easy to keep away from delicate areas.

If you have an item I have not mentioned, just ask!

Upon reviewing my last blog I realized I would end up writing chapters in a book and that the book would be excruicatingly boring; for me to write and probably for you to read. So I thought about maybe just having an open Q & A called "Ask the Jeweler". This will be a lot more fun for me and likely most helpful for anyone interested. That way I can answer specific questions rather than blather on about things you may not be specifically interested in. So...break out grandmas jewelry and that thing you picked up at a garage sale and start asking your unanswered questions about your own jewelry or anything else. I will try to answer within 24 hours. Ask away...