While in Los Angeles last weekend, I spent some time at a co-worker's house, sharing a wonderful evening with her and her family.  I arrived late in the afternoon, and was greeted at the door by my friend, her husband and her little boy.  This was the first time I had been to their home and they made me feel immediately welcome.

The little boy, an only child, 7 years old and bursting with energy, was the obvious star of the night. He engaged us with his ready grin and his lively eyes framed with a headful of red curls.  We visited.  We shared a meal.  And we were treated to a show, created and performed by this little star.  He had us captivated. We took pictures. We laughed. And we marveled at his imagination, execution and energy.

After "the show," performed in the kitchen, with "girls in the front chairs and boys in the back," and after he signed autographs for us, we retired to the living room.  My friend's husband had a new guitar, one that he has not yet learned to play, and which he had asked me to give its first test.  No arm twisting was required, of course, and I sat down and started plucking, "You Are My Sunshine."  My brain was trying to think of songs appropriate for a 7 year old, but nothing would present itself, so I sang the old song.  And the little boy curled up in his mother's lap and listened.

When I finished singing, I was surprised by the little guy.  "Will you sing it again?" he asked?  Well, of course I did and his dad sat at the piano and added to the concert, and the little boy sang along, in the comfort to his mother's lap, once a virtual bundle of energy, now completely absorbed in the quiet sharing of harmony. He asked for one more request...."Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star."  And I was happy to play it for him. His smile was my reward.

We played and sang for a couple of hours, his father, the piano player, who had not played in years, played from the music book he found in the piano bench, and we sang. And the little boy fell asleep in his mother's lap.  And I knew this little star's night had been made, as much by our show for him as his show for us.  As his mother carried the boy to bed, I remembered how it was, twenty years ago when my children were that age.  How sweet, how very sweet, those moments are.

When I left that night, it was with my autograph from this young star.  He had signed his name and added, "you are cool!"  So, there you have it.  At least I'm cool to one little boy.

Does it bother anyone else that eBay chooses to "raise" our search standing only if our shipping and handling charges "star" for the past 30 days is 4.7 or better?

Does it bother anyone else that eBay feels justified in manipulating the search by defaulting to the "best match" search for all buyers, and, at the same time giving no support to the sellers who charge only reasonable shipping?

Does it bother anyone else that eBay is offering incentives to sellers to offer "free shipping," thereby further exacerbating the buyer's hold over the seller on the single thing the seller really cannot control??? The cost of shipping the goods to the buyer? Are they WANTING the buyers to expect free shipping??? Are they just trying to ensure THEY can double collect on fees, not only in PayPal where sellers are already charged on the price including shipping, but also in the eBay Final Value Fees?

Does it bother anyone else that eBay, in their infinite wisdom of allowing sellers to leave only positive feedback, has caused a reaction AGAINST buyers...I see sellers recommending that other sellers leave NO feedback for buyers, in retaliation for the eBay policies.  This seems to be punishing  the wrong party, to me.

I just am wondering if it is just me, or whether others feel this whole thing feels like a hairball swirling faster and faster as it is being sucked down the drain......
 

So, I'm here in sunny southern California, except it ain't sunny!  In fact it's cloudy and has been raining off and on for a couple of days.  And it's chilly.  What's up with THAT?  And windy....yeah, it's been windy too, though not so much today.  And, of course, great planner that I am, I managed to get out here without a sweater or a sweatshirt or even a casual windbreaker....nope...I have business suit jackets.   So, I am quite sporty, I want you to know.  I'm currently wearing my jeans, sneakers, tank top and ....black suit jacket! (what a dork!)

Still, I am looking forward to a little relaxation, though I doubt it will be by the pool or at the beach.  At least I will be able to take my mind off work for a couple of days.  I elected to stay out here over the weekend rather than returning home and then flying out again (flying twice on Memorial Day weekend was NOT my idea of fun), so, for the weekend I moved to another hotel...one that I will pay for rather than "the company."  Of course, that meant making my move this morning and, not YET being grounded in California time, I nearly freaked out when I realized my 11 AM daily stand up meeting was running long and I was in danger of missing the noon check out time at the LAX Hilton.  I dashed down and checked out with just minutes to spare.

I got everything into my rental PT Cruiser (how odd) and set out for my next hotel, about thirty minutes away in Van Nuys (you get the picture, right?  I'm not about to pay big bucks and parking fees when it's MY nickel!)  Anyway, I'm driving along and getting ready to attend my next meeting when I glance at the clock in the PT Cruiser...9:30 AM...What?????  Oh, great!  I checked out of the first hotel on Eastern TIME!  And, check-in time at the Van Nuys place was not until 2:00PM and THEY know what time zone they are in.

So, I drove around a bit.  Took my next call in the car in a parking lot.  Did some work from my computer in the car in that same parking lot, and then started out again for the new hotel.  I arrived here at just a little after 11 AM PDT. I really, really had to use the rest room, so I crossed my fingers and went inside.  Beginning with my apology for showing up three hours before check-in time, I inquired as to whether they MIGHT have a room ready.  They were fabulous, and accommodated me, without hesitation.

Once in the room, and comfortable again, I spent the next couple of hours working.  And wrapped up my work day on East Coast time, since the Californians are all taking the day off, or leaving early for the holiday weekend.  And as I sat here, just typing my first post in a couple of days, there was a knock at my door.  Presuming it was the cleaning staff, thinking I was in need of their services, I went to to door to assure them I had just checked in and all was fine.  But when I opened the door, I was greeted by a sweet little lady (yes, one of the cleaning staff) who was carrying bottles of water and a tray of individually wrapped chocolates...she inquired as to how many I would like, and I accepted two of these little morsels, and the bottle of water....seems I AM royalty, after all... (yeah,I know, I belong to their hotel club, so I get cool treatment, but hey, I can PRETEND I'm royalty...)

And so, I returned to my chair, in front of the desk, in front of the window, out of which I can see the flags blowing in the wind, the gray skies and the threat of more rain....that, coupled with the fact that my "room with a view" offers the view of the Taco Bell and Burger King next door, makes me feel very much at home...this looks more like Virginia than California!

Oh, well....I'll eat my chocolate and drink my water and have me a rip-roaring good time!

Happy Memorial Day!

I am not a fan of Dulles airport. I'm certain it has been at least thirty years since I used that airport, and it has not gotten better with age, in my humble opinion.  I am also not a fan of the USAir flight I booked NOT being actually run by USAir.  Well, OK, I guess I don't care who runs the thing, but when I book a USAir flight, I expect to be able to check in at the USAir ticket counter...but NOOOOO...I cannot take that short little line, all convenient-like...I have to head WAYYYYYYY down to the United ticket counter.....  ARGGHHH....Double AARRRRGGGHHH when I realize I am entering the cattle-herding, wraparound lines reminiscent of amusement parks, but in no way amusing.... 

But I dutifully sidled up to the queue and shuffled along with the others, round and round, and round..... until, FINALLY, it was my turn to go up to one of the SELF-SERVE terminals to get my boarding pass..... OK, yeah, surprise, surprise, the terminal did not work.... No big deal, I just went to the next one that became available, as the person behind me sighed, wishing he had gotten in ahead of me, I'm sure.  Great, I finally had my boarding pass, had my single piece of luggage checked (they now CHARGE for more tha one piece of checked luggage) and headed for the rest room.  I wanted to change out of my business attire, into something a little more comfortable for a five hour flight.....but could I FIND the rest rooms???? NOOOOOO....in fact, there were so many queues of people waiting, I couldn't even get anywhere!

Finally, I decided I better just get in the line to get through the security checkpoint.  I donned my sneakers as I stood on queue and shoved my heels into my carry-on.  Again, with the cattle-herding, I walked several miles, I'm sure, through the winding, crowded queue!  And people were complaining right and left, so I didn't even need to.  I did spy the restrooms as I mosied along in my winding queue, but they were on the OTHER side of the rope and I was NOT about to get out of line at this point.

And, eventually, because I was SUCH a good girl, I was rewarded with MY turn at the security checkpoint.  I grabbed the four bins that would be necessary for my items being subjected to the scanner.  Into the first when my "liquids of 3.5 oz or less all contained in a single see-through quart sized zip-loc bag." Into the next went my work laptop. Into the third went my personal laptop. Into the fourth went my jacket and shoes.  I popped my two carry-on bags onto the conveyor belt, grabbed my boarding pass and walked myself through the people scanner....and I went off....ALARM!!!!....great, I'd forgotten to take off my Blackberry!  The TSA dude instructed me to put IT in a bowl and send it through the scanner...and then he approved my passage through the people scanner...since I no longer set off alarms.

OK, great, I have now been at this airport for nearly two hours and I just need to get to the restroom, change my clothes and get to my terminal C17.  I have an hour still before my flight takes off, so, it's all good.  Into the restroom I headed and changed into my jeans and put my business attire into my carry-on.  Then off I went to hunt C17.  Oh, a shuttle, you say?....OK, why not!  I got on the shuttle and a few minutes later we were offloaded at the C gates.  I found C17 and got on queue...AGAIN....to get a seat assignment.  After waiting on queue for another 20 minutes, the agent at the gate announced that the flight was overbooked and they were looking for volunteers to come back tomorrow morning for another crack at this fun....NO WAY!!  I am getting on this plane TONIGHT!

Yep, I did get a seat assignment and after only ONE MORE QUEUE, I finally boarded the plane, put my very heavy backpack containing my two laptops in the overhead bin, and sat down in my seat...of course, the middle seat.  I was very thankful that the two dudes who sat on either side of me were neither HUGE, nor had BO! LOL It would have been a VERY long flight otherwise.  As I prepared to drift off into my nap (I always sleep when flying), two rows forward of me, a baby started crying...then wailing....great...it WAS going to be a long flight. Oh, and we had to await a technician who had to come on board to fix a faulty seatbelt.....minor delay, thankfully.

I did fall asleep and managed to sleep most of the flight.  But every time I awakened, that poor baby was still wailing!  What an insane trip that had to have been for the mother and all those sitting directly next to them.  Still, we all endured and eventually, just as the baby decided it was time to sleep, we touched down in San Diego.  I had only two more queues to endure before I was in my rental car (can you believe they gave me a PT Cruiser??? What's up with THAT?) and on my way to the hotel.

And here I sit, unwinding from a day that began for me at 6:00 AM Eastern time.....

And I have to meet the guys in the hotel main lobby at 7:15 AM......

And I'm not tired......

But at least I have finished with queues for the day, and am free to move about my room at will!

OK, I admit it.  I'm being lazy!   I'm up here in one of Dad and Lynne's guest bedrooms, while everyone else is downstairs eating breakfast, going for morning walks etc....I am editing photos from yesterday's party before heading down to help get ready for today's party.  Yesterday was a lot of fun, highlighted by none other than the birthday girl herself.

My mother is a "knitter" and she loves to knit for others.  She was quite anxious to see how Alicia, her now 21 year old granddaughter would like the present she had made her.  We all dutifully came in from the deck, where the grill was still offering the pleasant aromas of the marinated meat cooked there and the conversation centered around the newly indoctrinated into the "legal drinking age," to watch Alicia open her gifts.  (Mom is less mobile than most of the rest of us, so we move the party to HER rather than asking her to come to the party.)

I'm not sure what Alicia was expecting when she opened the lovely package.  However, with a mid-May birthday, and temperatures already in hte 80's, my guess is she was NOT expecting a knitted shawl, belt and ......................................  HAT!!!!   LOL...I had to laugh as everyone tried to help her decide the "proper" way to wear this colorful gift.  But it really didn't matter.  A beautiful girl with a winning smile....no matter how she positions it on her head, she wears it well!




Hope you have a great Sunday.... I will.

While I have known I had to make this trip to CA SOMETIME in the near future, the coordination of the actual dates was outside of my control.  On Thursday afternoon, as I met with my team in Baltimore, MD, I queried the one in charge of arranging the details as to whether we WOULD be traveling to CA the week of the 19th.  He said, most likely not, since they had not yet verified all the folks we need to meet with would be available then.  OK, I thought, I can get some stuff done around the house next week. 

Thursday night at 11:39 PM my Blackberry emitted its rude "passing gas" sound, alerting me to an incoming message.  I looked and discovered that we had been green-lighted for heading out there on the 19th.  Great!  Nothing like the old wait, wait, wait...hurry. hurry, hurry!  No problem, I want to get this job knocked out because I have ton of other work to complete and this one is hanging over my head.

Still, this meant that Friday was spent getting prepared to leave town for a couple of weeks, while at the same time working a ten hour day filled with conference calls.  It was my boss's last day with the company, and I have assumed his management duties on an interim basis, until his replacement has been hired.  So, busy I am and busy I stay.

One of my personal projects (I always have "projects" going) was to make videos of my daughter and son-in-law's wedding last April.  I took over 250 photos and made a video and added music from recorded files of my kids and me singing.  I was happy with the video, but still had the "packaging" to do.  I burned the videos to CD and then used the Lightscribe technology (my first attempt at using this) to inscribe the "labels" on the CD's.  I used one of the wedding photos as the background for the label and was VERY happy with the results.  I used slim-line DVD cases which allowed me to insert black and white 5 X 7 printed copies of couple of the wedding shots as the front and back covers of the case.  All in all, when, at 12:30 AM I finished the last copy, I was pleased with the results.  I made 20 of them to give to family members.

Of course, I still had that pesky chore of actually planting plants I had secured last weekend, and planting seeds for summer flowers....I needed to get that done before leaving for two weeks...so, as the computer was labeling my CD's, I was running in and out  of the house, planting....and yeah, I realized I had better mow the lawn or come back to a jungle....so, I snuck that in there too.  By dusk, I had all of my outside work completed and had only laundry and packing yet to do....laundry was also completed by the time my CD project was done.

So this morning, after a nice restful sleep, I got the packing done.  I have to do my final shipment for eBay, and have put my store on vacation for two weeks.  I'm sitting here trying to figure out what I have left UNDONE!  I'm sure there is something.  There always is.  At least I have a couple of hours to relax before setting out on the first leg of my journey.  Today is the  party for my niece's 21st birthday.  We will gather at my sister's for the event.  I will have my guitar with me, and I hope they have their voices ready to join in.

Tomorrow will be at Dad's for another party for my daughter and son-in-law, for the rest of the family to meet the new member of our family...and again, we will, most likely, sing, play cards, and just do those things we ALWAYS do as a family....(EAT, EAT, EAT) ....  And Sunday night when I make my way to the hotel room in No. VA and have to turn my focus back to work, it will be with a rejuvenated mind...rejuvenated with the refreshing life I always feel surging at the end of these family gatherings.

I'll check in from CA, I'm sure, but if I don't see you for a while, I hope you have a wonderful couple of weeks. 

It seems I have lived a life of hand-me-downs.  Of course, I was the second child in a family of six children, with parents who had to make the best use of every resource they had, and once clothes were purchased or made for my sister, they could not be discarded when she outgrew them.  So, thankful at least that I WAS a GIRL and these hand-me-downs were GIRL clothes, I accepted the clothes that fit my tall skinny sister well, and which would stretch uncomfortably around my chubbier frame, while ALWAYS requiring hemming....since I grew up 40 years before it became fashionable to walk on the hems of pants and such.

I remember thinking how unfair it was that Jeannie got all the "good stuff" and I got all the used stuff.  Truthfully, Jeannie also got lots of hand-me-downs from neighbor kids who were "only children", but THOSE clothes were always better than ours too.  Still, I endured and managed to find my way to school every day clad in something that covered me sufficiently and life went on.

When I was in Jr. High and started working jobs where I earned money, my OWN money, I started buying NEW clothes...clothes which I would be the first to wear and which were purchased only after I ensured they fit ME without alterations.  And I discovered something rather quickly.  New clothes were expensive.  Not only that, but they took some time to really get "comfortable."  Itchy tags and stiff fabric had not been a regular experience for me, and I was not impressed with them now!  I started to appreciate the softer, "broken in" models that lay piled in heaps on my pig sty of a bedroom floor, whilst my newly purchased clothes hung neatly in the closet...protected from aging, by not being worn.

I also started to realize that my sister had broken in more than just clothing for me.  She had broken in my parents. Sure, it appeared they thought she could do no wrong, whilst their perceptions of my brothers and me were not so stellar.  But in reality, they were harder on Jeannie than on the rest of us.  With the expectation of perfection comes huge responsibility.  Now, in retrospect, I of course realize, my parents neither thought my my sister perfect nor had any expectations that she BE perfect, but this was something I could only discover after having children of my own.  As a youngster, I was convinced this was true.

So Jeannie "tried on" being "in charge" of her younger siblings first and I learned from her...I was the opposite baby-sitter from her style, allowing my brothers to do "fun" stuff, whilst Jeannie always wanted us to "work" whilst Mom and Dad were gone.  And Jeannie "tried on" dating first, and I watched with dread at the thought of my OWN dating experiences yet to come. Thankfully, Jeannie started MUCH younger than did I, allowing me lots of time to learn what NOT to do to get my parents' attention.  And Jeannie's wearing of the dating game for several years before I chose to participate also ensured I had more mellow, comfortable parental attention, when attention was focused in my direction.

Driving the red and white '58 Chevy Station Wagon (the car in which all of us learned to drive) was, again, easier for me, because Jeannie had already "taught" my parents how to teach their children to drive.  And, while I was embarrassed to drive that huge old car, I was comfortable doing so, knowing that my sister had to drive it too....and that my brothers would all get their opportunity too.

Jeannie even went off to FSU to seek her college degree, and at Dad's encouragement, I also applied there.  (don't worry, you'll never be accepted at your first choice of schools.)  And so I followed my sister, accepting the path she had already trampled, thereby making it easier for me to traverse.  I even secured a room in the same dorm as my sister, at Dad''s suggestion... (don't worry, you NEVER get your first choice of dorms...)  But, Jeannie, clearly tiring of the tag-a-long, albeit, the unwilling tag-a-long, managed to move out of the dorm into an apartment before I arrived on the scene, and I was left with the hand-me-down friends she had made there...and they made MY experience that much more comfortable.

My sister turns 51 on Monday.  I'm glad she is doing so, because it is my turn to "try on" 50, and if she does not discard it, outgrow it, I will be left, forever 49.  I've certainly enjoyed my year of being the perfect square, but, in July, I will be ready to put 49 on the shelf for my brother Tim to use in October.  And I will slip into the comfortable, "gently worn" 50 that Jeannie will leave hanging in the closet for me, as she dons 51.

This weekend will be one of much celebration in my family.  We will be officially celebrating my niece's 21st birthday, and having the reception party for my daughter and son-in-law who were married in April at a very small wedding.  But, we will also be unofficially celebrating my Dad and step-mom's 30th wedding anniversary, and Jeannie's 51st birthday....and I will be eying with great interest, the 50 she has made comfortable for me.  Somehow, I just know it will fit comfortably.  And today I appreciate the hand-me-down more than I could ever have imagined as a kid!

Today, though I did not know it when I awoke and started working in my office at 3 AM, I was to have an office full of action.  Yes, that's right.  My little 10 X 12 room that serves as my home office for my real work, my eBay shipping center, my upstairs eBay blogging headquarters, and my occasional nap-time place on the futon, was to be invaded by a team of four guys installing my new 2 1/2 ton AC/heat pump unit.

Now, to be honest, it all started off innocently enough at about 7:30 AM.  Killian alerted us to the fact that no-good delivery types were approaching and had the audacity to actually drive their vehicle into HER territory.  I rewarded her decision to try to bite their tires, in eager anticipation of ankles soon to be descending to the ground, by collaring her and escorting her to her "time out" in the kennel...in the house...poor dog!  Only two guys started the task of removing my degenerate AC unit and replacing it with the A-student model.  They looked a little nervous when I opted to capture their efforts on digital media.  But they soon grew used to my snapping pictures here and there.



Sure, I also snapped some of the curious growth on a nearby tree stump. 



And I marveled as I spied the first bloom of my flowers that look a lot like black-eyed-susans but are not, and whose name starts with an R.... some kind of Daisy...and so, of course, I captured that as well...but I digress.



Shortly before lunch, the two, now working in the attic whose access is gained through the hole in my office ceiling, announced that they had called in reinforcements to help them get the job done.  It seems this unit is MUCH bigger and MUCH heavier than the one they removed.  And so it was that my office, this little 10 X 12 space, was suddenly filled with five of us!  Of course, only four were working on the task at hand, while one of us was pretending to do REAL work whilst snapping pics of the REAL fun!



And so it was that, 8 1/2 hours after they began their task, they left me with a new AC unit, a lot of pics and a very relieved dog.  When the guy who checks up on the work was saying good-bye, I mentioned that I had proof his guys work hard.  He laughed and said, "yeah, they told me....it's not EVERYDAY that the homeowner snaps pictures of the AC guys doing the work!" 

"Really?" I said, but, they were working so hard! There SHOULD be documentation of their efforts!"

Well, at any rate, my pocketbook might be a little lighter (a LOT LIGHTER) and I might STILL be grumbling about that dastardly AC unit that couldn't see fit to walk the straight and narrow and HAD to be replaced, but I had fun today and it seems they did too.  (They kept assuring me I was not getting their "best side"...I did not dare ask...I just assured them, I'd take what I could get!

When I was a kid I heard the story of Goldilocks and the three bears. I remember considering that Goldilocks quite brave to venture into a place unknown to her and to, once inside, have the nerve to sample the porridge in the bowls on the table.  Had it been THIS little blond, curly haired youngster, I would not have been so brave.  I wasn't sure whether she was really brave or just "dumb."

But I suppose I was focusing on the wrong message when I was a little one.  I related not to the finding of the perfect chair, the perfect bowl of porridge at the right temperature and the perfect bed to sleep off a satisfying meal.  Instead I focused on my fear of treading where I had not been invited. 

Today, as an adult, I recognize more of a Goldilocks in myself than ever would have been the case as a young child.  For today, though a far cry from the cute little golden-haired child of the fairy tale, I find I continue to search and "try on" even when not invited to do so.  And I have found something that I must accept as part of me.  I haven't finished "growing."  What might be comfortable today, might well  rub me wrong tomorrow.  Certainly, I enjoy the comfort of finding that "perfect fit" and I have enjoyed some comfortable fits, though perhaps, not perfect, in my life.

And I wonder if I will ever reach a stage where I am Goldilocks no more.  In a way, I like that I have outgrown the fear of always waiting to be invited in.  In some ways, I am happy that the growth and the desire to find that comfortable fit has taken me on such an interesting journey, though I often wonder whether I am being brave or just really dumb.  And in a way, I'd like very much to be able to say, "good bye" to Goldilocks, the seeker, and "welcome home" to Goldilocks, the comfortably satisfied.  But, I suspect, that is a still few years in the future.

I found this a good read.  I was reminded, once again, of the choices and the discoveries of life.  And I was encouraged by the message. And I thought I'd share.

Oh, the Places You’ll Go!

Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You’re off to Great Places!
You’re off and away!
You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose.
You’re on your own.  And you know what you know.
And YOU are the guy who’ll decide where to go.
You’ll look up and down streets. Look ‘em over with care.
About some you will say, “I don’t choose to go there.”
With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet,
you’re too smart to go down any not-so-good street.
And you may not find any
you’ll want to go down.
In that case, of course,
you’ll head straight out of town.
It’s opener there
in the wide open air.
Out there things can happen
and frequently do
to people as brainy
and footsy as you.
And when things start to happen,
don’t worry.  Don’t stew.
Just go right along.
You’ll  start happening too.
OH!
THE PLACES YOU’LL GO!
You’ll be on your way up!
You’ll be seeing great sights!
You’ll join the high fliers
who soar to high heights.
You won’t lag behind, because you’ll have the speed.
You’ll pass the whole gang and you’ll soon take the lead.
Wherever you fly, you’ll be the best of the best.
Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.
Except when you don’t
Because, sometimes, you won’t.
I’m sorry to say so
but, sadly, it’s true
and hang-ups
can happen to you.
You can get all hung up
in a prickle-ly perch.
And your gang will fly on.
You’ll be left in a Lurch.
You’ll come down from the Lurch
with an unpleasant bump.
And the chances are, then,
that you’ll be in a Slump.
And when you’re in a Slump,
you’re not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself
is not easily done.
You will come to a place where the streets are not marked.
Some windows are lighted.  But mostly they’re darked.
A place you could sprain both you elbow and chin!
Do you dare to stay out?  Do you dare to go in?
How much can you lose? How much can you win?
And IF you go in, should you turn left or right…
or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite?
Or go around back and sneak in from behind?
Simple it’s not, I’m afraid you will find,
for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.
You can get so confused
that you’ll start in to race
down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace
and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space,
headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.
The Waiting Place…
…for people just waiting.
Waiting for a  train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or waiting around for a Yes or a No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.
Waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for Friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
Everyone is just waiting.
NO!
That’s not for you!
Somehow you’ll escape
all that waiting and staying.
You’ll find the bright places
where Boom Bands are playing.
With banner flip-flapping,
once more you’ll ride high!
Ready for anything under the sky.
Ready because you’re that kind of a guy!
Oh, the places you’ll go! There is fun to be done!
There are points to be scored. There are games to be won.
And the magical things you can do with that ball
will make you the winning-est winner of all.
Fame!  You’ll be famous as famous can be,
with the whole wide world watching you win on TV.
Except when they don’t.
Because, sometimes, they won’t.
I’m afraid that some times
you’ll play lonely games too.
Games you can’t win
’cause you’ll play against you.
All  Alone!
Whether you like it or not,
Alone will be something
you’ll be quite a lot.
And when you’re alone, there’s a very good chance
you’ll meet things that scare you right out of your pants.
There are some, down the road between hither and yon,
that can scare you so much you won’t want to go on.
But on you will go
though the weather be foul
On you will go
though your enemies prowl
On you will go
though the Hakken-Kraks howl
Onward up many
a frightening creek,
though your arms may get sore
and your sneakers may leak.
On and on you will hike
and I know you’ll hike far
and face up to your problems
whatever they are.
You’ll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You’ll get mixed up
with many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life’s
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.
And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)
KID, YOU’LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!
So…
be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray
or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O’Shea,
you’re off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So…get on your way!
Dr. Seuss

On my mother's birthday last month, I took the opportunity to photograph her hands.  I did this upon the suggestion of another blogger, who, as she watched her mother pass away from cancer, spent many hours studying the hands of the woman who had raised her. For the love that was between these two was demonstrated not so much in the words, "I love you" spoken, but in the actions of these hands. 

My own mother was a little surprised when I snapped a photo of her hands, and asked why.  I responded with my typical, "why not?"  And she then went on to explain that at 73, her hands look better than did her own mother's who died at age 54 of cancer.  Her own mother's hands showed the veins popping up in sharp contrast to the milky white skin, while mom's veins are hidden securely under the surface of her plumper, healthier hands.  But clearly, my mother HAD also observed her own mother's hands.  There is a connection there, between the hands and the love.

Today, as I pondered Mother's Day, and it's meaning to me, both as a mother and a daughter, I understand the connection of the hands better than I could have even a month ago.  For, as a child I relied on Mom being able to fix all things that broke, wipe up all things that spilled, bandage all things that bled, feed all beings that hungered, and comfort all beings that hurt.  And through it all, even with all of these expectations of those hands, not only by me, but also by my five siblings, my mother continued to create a fabric of memories, knitting together the life I knew as a young child.  For, from her hands were rarely missing those knitting needles.  They were fast at work as she directed the chores, and the homework.  They were fast at work as she read aloud to the children before bed and to my father as he hooked his rugs in evening, after the children had gone to bed.  And they knit her through stress, and happiness, sorrow and joy.

And it also occurred to me that as a mother, I feel so very lost when I am unable to use my hands to help my children.  There are those hurts that simply cannot be comforted over the phone from 3000 miles away, those hurts that a simple rubbing of the shoulders would ease, just a little.  And I think how very lucky I am to be able to occasionally still demonstrate my love through my hands' actions.  There are many, my mother included, who have lost children, and who will never again be able to nurture with their hands those who will forever be a part of them, though no longer with this world.  I remember this can happen in the blink of an eye. And I put my hands together in silent prayer, thanking for all that I have, asking for the grace to continue to use my hands in love's actions.

On this Mother's Day, I wish all who are mothers, of children young, old, or no longer with us on this earth, a resounding thank you for the hands you have used to comfort, teach, discipline, and love those who have been the most beloved to you.  Happy Mother's Day.

Mom's Hands.

OK, so my time on the blogs is limited these days by real life callings, but I do try to check in daily and at least get a "read" on the community.  Yesterday, and the day before, for all intents and purposes, I missed even a reasonable perusal of the blogs.  But this morning, when I took a peek, I see some regular bloggers, those who have made their own little niche here, declaring they are leaving and clearly, suffering from hurt feelings. 

I have no idea what happened, but I can assure you, I have had my feelings hurt here too.  Often, I suppose, it was my own doing.  In the beginning I was always "ready to help" answer questions, give advice, etc.  I thought this was a good thing, but eventually, one of the infamous, "speakers of the truth, caped in his / her 0 ID" alerted me to the fact that I was considered a blog know-it-all and such.  Sure, that hurt my feelings because my intentions were far from the resulting effect.  And I pulled back a little.

As the months went by, now stretching into almost two years here, I have come to realize that what I blog about is my business and some will find me boring, others will find me arrogant, still others might find I strike a chord with them.  But none of that changes the fact that my blog entries are my own, my thoughts, and carry no intended criticism of particular individuals.  I never delete comments and do not mind opposing points of view, in fact, I welcome them.  But, to be honest, I rarely comment on others' post these days.  Part of this is a real time constraint issue, and part is simply that there is so much going on in these blogs that I am not aware of, that my comments might well be misconstrued, or misunderstood.  Still, I have not "left the blogs." 

There are many here whose contributions I really enjoy.  And there are many here whose contributions I could live without.  But I would hate to see any bloggers throw in the towel because of hurt feelings.  I blog here because it is a reasonable place for me to keep a daily journal of sorts and I intend to continue.  I'm here anyway, trying to sell my items and looking for bargains on items I need.  So why not?

But, apparently something happened in the past two days that got under the skin of some decent bloggers.  If they are reading, just know, it IS hard when others' words hurt your feelings, but that doesn't mean you should give up something you enjoy.  If you have lost the enjoyment of the blogs, that is a different story.  And if you decide, upon further reflection, that coming back to the blogs is what you want, don't worry about explaining the whys for your return....we are ALL free to move about the blogs at will.  Nobody here is king or queen.

Have a happy Saturday!

Today was one of those days.  In fact, it is still going on.  I am just taking a much needed break.  I  have been "at it" since 4 AM, and still have several hours of work before my project is complete.  I wanted to stop a few times. Well, actually, I DID grab a very short nap at 4 PM, but was not what I really WANTED to do.  I WANTED to run outside and play in the nice weather.  OK, so it was raining a little today and maybe playing outside would not have been as thrilling as I'd like to believe, but from my vantage point, outside looked REALLY good.

I am grateful, however, that I get to work from home a great deal of the time.  At least here I can look out my office window and see the birds and squirrels at play in the trees. For nearly eighteen years I worked in an office building with no windows.  I would arrive at work before daybreak and leave after night fall much of the time, and, unless I took a walk at lunchtime, I would often have no clue what the day had even been like.  Hot, cold, rain, wind, snow...who knew???

So, while this might have been a LONG day couped up in my office, at least I COULD look out the window....and dream.

I think I'm ready for a refill on my tea....

When we closed on our newly built house six years ago, we were presented our "home owner's manual."  This loose bound notebook of goodies held such things as the warranties for the appliances, the care and keeping of the house in general and the warranty on the house construction itself.  As with anything new, we poured over the book, getting acquainted with our abode.  All was going along swimmingly when hubby spied the notation that, "these houses were built in such a manner that they should be protected by controlling the interior climate."  Basically, the advice offered was that opening the windows should be done ONLY when the outside atmosphere was ideal...low or no humidity being the key factor.

Well, anyone who lives in these parts of VA will know that there are relatively few days in a year when humidity is low AND the weather is conducive to WANTING to have the windows open.  So, hubby declared his "no open window" policy.  To help ensure compliance with this edict, he instructed the folks who came to complete the "punch list" not to install the window screens.

For six years the screens have resided, neatly stacked against the wall in the shed, and the windows of the house have remained dutifully closed, ensuring compliance with the aforementioned edict, and a happy, climate controlled house interior as promised by the "manual."  That is, until Sunday.  On Sunday, with the upstairs AC out for the second day, and the upstairs' temperature creeping toward an uncomfortable 90 degrees, I made a stand.  I defied both hubby AND the almighty home owner's manual, climbed to the roof of the front porch and the back deck and installed three screens. 

Yes, siree, Bob, I was going to have cross ventilation or die trying!  Hubby didn't say a word as he held the ladder for me to make my ascent to the roof and my return descent.  He didn't offer supervisory "advice" as I struggled with the virgin voyage of the screens into windows unaccustomed to their tight embrace.  And he did not cheer with me when I was ultimately successful in my efforts.

Once back inside, I opened the windows and enjoyed the breeze with which my efforts were rewarded.  I just KNEW it would decide to thunderstorm or something and I would hear the "I TOLD you SO," from hubby.  But it did not.  And when, on Monday, the AC folks assured me it would be at least a week before I would have the new AC unit installed, I was VERY pleased I had taken the initiative and defied the "rules!" 

At night I get to hear the "woods alive" as I sleep and that is an added treat.  I remember sleeping with my windows open for years.  There is something very comforting about those night noises.  They seem to refresh me. 

I'm thinking that when the new AC is installed, and the windows are once again sealed against the accidental entry of the "outside atmosphere," I will have to erect my tent in the woods and take some "vacation camping nights" there!  

Hope you had a restful night and your day will be great as a result.

I know there is harmony in the world.  I feel it; I hear it; and I try to capture it.  When I sing with others I don't actually feel I am "making up" the harmony, but rather, finding it where is already exists.... waiting in quiet anticipation of a voice on which to be carried.

Tonight I had my very high-tech recording studio in full swing.  Yes, that's right.  I had recorded myself playing my guitar and singing some songs.  I had made these recordings with the "sound recorder" that comes standard with these Windows systems.  I used my external microphone, you know, the $9.99 deal, to capture the WONDER that IS my hack job guitar playing and my singing.  Having successfully captured a number of these little ditties, I then had copied them to a CD. 

It was armed with this CD that I set out to try my harmonization experimentation tonight.  Sitting comfortably, cross-legged on the floor of my "front room," I carefully placed the CD into the little CD player, (not the player in the laptop), opened the original .wav file I had created for the first song, pressed the RECORD button on the "sound recorder" and the PLAY button on the CD player, and , as the strains of my prerecorded CD filled the air, I sang with myself, adding a harmony.  All of this was, again, captured by my trusty little external microphone.

When I listened to my resulting product through the laptop speakers, I was not too impressed with the sound.  But when I plugged the headphones into the sound card, I was very happy with the results.  Yep, that was me, playing my guitar, and singing in two part harmony. 

Now, understand, I was just going to "experiment" with this tonight.  When I finished harmonizing my last song, I looked at the time and discovered it was after 11 PM...and I had started before 9 PM.....  I had no idea where the time had gone.  But of one thing I have become certain.  No matter who I am jamming with, I lose track of time and can go into the wee hours without so much as a yawn.  And I have to believe it is the music itself that performs this magic.

Still, I'm thinking that maybe those songs would sound even BETTER with three part harmony.... I wonder if I can squeeze another jam session into my schedule tomorrow night...

Yes, yes, I know, I am easily amused.  But truthfully, to me, life is about harmony.  And being able to listen and hear it, and being able to capture it, both in music and in everyday living, is something I believe I will always strive to do.  And I am certain that harmony cannot exist without the ability to listen to those around me.  Sometimes, when I am feeling not quite right with my world, I realize I have stopped listening.

I noticed that someone (could not POSSIBLY have been ME) left a hatchet at an apparent "work site" in my yard.  While it seems unlikely that the stump in which it currently rests (for several years now, judging by the state of rust) is the tree that was chomped down with that rather small hatchet, I'm certain it was useful in whatever smaller saplings were being whacked with it.

Seeing it though, made me wonder about that saying, "burying the hatchet."  When I looked at the hatchet "buried" in the tree stump it occurred to me that burying the hatchet could be pretty painful, depending on the "burial site."  Do you think Lizzie Borden was just trying to "bury the hatchet" but lacking a hatchet, opted for an ax????

Just wondering...

Hope y'all have a great day!

Today was an irritating day.  I knew it would be. Our upstairs AC unit had gone out on Saturday and today the folks were to call to tell me the damage.  Let's just say, I will be buying new heat pumps/AC units for both upstairs and down and will have to just fall in love with them, because they are NOT a cheap date! 

When I completed my final conference call of the day and was "free to move about the country," I did just that.  On foot, I went and I traveled no further than my own property.  There is something so very rewarding and peaceful about country living.  I took my camera with me and looked up at that sky, which rewarded me with wispy white clouds on a lovely blue background.  The trees framed the sky with the their new spring green clothing and I breathed deeply.  That felt good.



I looked down at the garden I had spent Saturday weeding.  Nothing there yet is in bloom, but the green foliage promises much to come.  The bushes, both planted and wild ARE blooming though, and their delicate flowers are beautiful against the green that is the woods. 




As I looked down, I spied a toad.  On stealthy feet I stalked that toad, and eventually, was able to get close enough to capture his photo.  While I originally spied him in the grass, he hopped his way over to a large tree stump before he felt "safe."  Clearly, his camouflaged coat, he believes, provides a safety barrier against the great, white-shoe-clad humanoid. 



Funny, I thought, the plants produce a showy flower, to attract while the toad sports his camouflage to avoid detection. And I think I am more like the toad.  But I admire those who are more like the flower.



Just me...looking up and looking down....and thinking.

I particularly LOVE looking at my Seller Dashboard...you know, the one that lets sellers know how well they are doing on the Detailed Seller Ratings for the past 30 days.  Yes, indeedy.  It really does my heart GOOD to log in and see that,

" You are at risk of losing your 15% discount.You earned your PowerSeller discount on 04/22/08."

Oh, thank you.  REALLY??  You mean the folks who are giving me great verbal feedback and who are getting great items for a penny...yeah, 1 CENT, and who SELECT Parcel Post shipping BUT get upgraded (at no extra charge) to Priority Mail, have decided to rate my shipping time at 4 out of 5 and my shipping costs at 4 out of 5.  Yep. I ship the day I receive payment or the next business day.  I charge actual shipping plus $1.25 handling fee, which includes insurance through U-PIC.  And....for that...I am at risk of losing the WHOPPING $7.65 discount I received in April for my perfect 5.0 across the board for THAT 30-day period.

No matter.  I am really beginning to understand the MEGA POWER SELLERS who have already determined the COST of getting the eBay seller discount is NOT worth the REAL cost of keeping every customer so happy they will rate them 5 in all categories.

Anyway, this whole thing just keeps getting better and better.  On the GOOD side, since sales were off for yet ANOTHER month for me, and because I did have to put my store on Vacation for two weeks in April, my typical monthly chunk of change to eBay was only $130, vs. the norm of $300-400.

EVERYONE'S A WINNER!  (yeah!)

So, I thoroughly enjoy playing the guitar in our choir.  I especially enjoy playing when our other guitarist (the one who can actually PLAY) is there.  Today was such a day.  And, as usual, we had fun, not only playing the music, but bantering with each other.

Trey's mother is our choir director.  As we prepared to practice one of the songs, she declared, "OK, we need to decide who is going to sing what."

Being the general smart alack I am, I piped up with, "I will sing all of the C's". 
Our choir director bantered back, "is that all the "c" notes, or all the words "sea?"
My response, "I will sing all words "sea" on note "c"....everything will be "c level."

And JUST when I thought the silliness was over, Trey piped up with, "the ironic thing is, Judy can't "see."  (thank you Trey)

Meanwhile, as menopause is my current state of residence, I am forever taking off my jacket, and then, in two minutes when I am once again freezing, putting my jacket back on.  Trey helped me with it on several occasions as I struggled to remove it, without tangling myself in my guitar strap ...  at one point he suggested that I needed a cape, rather than a jacket.  But when, before the service actually started, the announcements were read and we were, as always, invited to greet those sitting around us, so that there would be no strangers amongst us, I turned to Trey and introduced myself, "Hi, I'm Hot!"

He laughed and chided me, "Judy, that's HUGELY INAPPROPRIATE!  My wife is sitting RIGHT THERE!"  And the two of us were into our typical tough to control giddiness, that we MUST reign in before the service begins. 

Playing the guitar, singing the songs, and thoroughly enjoying the people makes my day, every single time. And today was no exception.  I hope you had a day with at least one silly laugh.

I was squatting down, looking at the weeds that covered that hillside in Berkeley.  My friends were also exploring the lookout over the town from this vantage point and snapping pictures as they visited.  I, having yet to have adopt the "camera in my pocket for all occasions" posture, was in my own little world of investigations.



"What are you doing?" my friend asked as I was holding a purple weed very close to my good eye and peering through it to the landscape below. 



Maybe a little embarrassed, I explained what I was doing, experimenting with how things looked "through" the flower.  I don't know what I expected, but my friend took the little purple weed that had captured my fancy and began taking photographs.



When I transfered the photos to the computer I was amazed at what my friend had captured.  It was as if I had been the camera, for my vision was captured perfectly. 





Tonight as I continued my editing of photos from my recent trip to CA, I smiled when I saw the little purple weed. I'm guessing it is rarely the subject of such intense focus, and yet, and yet, it stood up admirably to the challenge to which I subjected it.  And it, well, to be honest, my friend's willingness to explore MY interest IN it, provided me with not only a lovely memory of a perfect afternoon and evening, but with a rather unique and intriguing view of "nature through nature."