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As I have just returned from an unexpected road trip.....

......I feel the need to post this which was emailed to me. I think ANY woman who has been on a road trip can relate to this!

ISN'T THIS THE TRUTH ?????? 
> you may need to stop at the women's restroom . . . be prepared! 

> When you have to visit a public bathroom, you usually find a line of 
> women, so you smile politely and take your place. Once it's your 
> turn, you check for feet under the stall doors. Every stall is 
> occupied. 

> Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knock ing down the 
> woman leaving the stall. 
> You get in to find the door won't latch. It doesn't matter, the wait 
> has been so long you are about to wet your pants! The dispenser for 
> the modern "seat covers" (invented by someone's Mom, no doubt) is 
> handy, but empty. You would hang your purse on the door hook, if 
> there was one, but there isn't - so you carefully, but quickly drape 
> it around your neck, (Mom would turn over in her grave if you put it 
> on the FLOOR!), yank down your pants, and assume " The Stance." 

> In this position your aging, toneless thigh muscles begin to shake. 
> You'd love to sit down, but you certainly hadn't taken time to wipe 
> the seat or lay toilet paper on it, so you hold "The Stance." 

> To take your mind off your trembling thighs, you reach for what you 
> discover to be the empty toilet paper dispenser. In your mind, you 
> can hear your mother's voice saying, "Honey, if you had tried to 
> clean the seat, you would have KNOWN there was no toilet paper!" Your 
> thighs shake more. 

> You remember the tiny tissue that you blew your nose on yesterday - 
> the one that's still in your purse. (Oh yeah, the purse around your 
> neck, that now, you have to hold up trying not to strangle yourself 
> at the same time). That would have to do. You crumple it in the 
> puffiest way possible. It's still smaller than your thumbnail . 

> Someone pushes your door open because the latch doesn't work. The 
> door hits your purse, which is hanging around your neck in front of 
> your chest, and you and your purse topple backward against the tank 
> of the toilet. "Occupied!" you scream, as you reach for the door, 
> dropping your precious, tiny, crumpled tissue in a puddle on the 
> floor, lose your footing altogether, and slide down directly onto the 
> TOILET SEAT. It is wet of course. You bolt up, knowing all too well 
> that it's too late. Your bare bottom has made contact with every 
> imaginable germ and life form on the uncovered seat because YOU never 
> laid down toilet paper - not that there was any, even if you had 
> taken time to try. You know that your mother would be utterly 
> appalled if she knew, because, you're certai n her bare bottom never 
> touched a public toilet seat because, frankly, dear, "You just don't 
> KNOW what kind of diseases you could get." 

> By this time, the automatic sensor on the back of the toilet is so 
> confused that it flushes, propelling a stream of water like a fire 
> hose against the inside of the bowl that sprays a fine mist of water 
> that covers your butt and runs down your legs and into your shoes. 
> The flush somehow sucks everything down with such force that you grab 
> onto the empty toi let paper dispenser for fear of being dragged in 
> too. 

> At this point, you give up. You're soaked by the spewing water and 
> the wet toilet seat. You're exhausted. You try to wipe with a gum 
> wrapper you found in your pocket and then slink out inconspicuously 
> to the sinks. 

> You can't figure out how to operate the faucets with the automatic 
> sensors, so you wipe your hands with spit and a dry paper towel and 
> walk past the line of women still waiting. 

> You are no longer able to smile politely to them. A kind soul at the 
> very end of the line points out a piece of toilet paper trailing from 
> your shoe. (Where was that when you NEEDED it??) You yank the paper 
> from your shoe, plunk it in the woman's hand and tell her warmly, 
> "Here, you just might need this." 

> As you exit, you spot your hubby, who has long since entered, used, 
> and left the men's restroom. Annoyed, he asks, "What took you so 
> long, and why is your purse hanging around your neck?" 

> This is dedicated to women everywhere who deal with a public 
> restrooms (rest??? you've GOT to be kidding!!). It finally explains 
> to the men what really does take us so long. It also answers their 
> other commonly asked questions about why women go to the restroom in 
> pairs. It's so the other gal can hold the door, hang onto your purse 
> and hand you Kleenex under the door! 

> This HAD to be written by a woman! No one else could describe it so 
> accurately! 

Cloth Diapers: I am Confused and Broke....

Okay so I have been thrown into cloth diapering after a year of using disposies. And all I can muster is THANK GOD for www.diaperswappers.com (and eBay of course ;o)  )!!!!! The ladies there are SO helpful and knowledgeable!!! They are truly a God send!

Now, I am an educated woman. I have 2 degrees and 2 minors with some grad school work under my belt. However, I never in a million years thought something as simple as cloth diapers would have me so confused and stressed out.....and now broke to boot! Holy choices batman! Should I do prefolds? AIOs? pockets? covers? wool? cotton? ACK!!!!!

I have settled on AIOs. I figured it is most like disposies. But I am find my ALL in ones are NOT really ALL as most of them are not really waterproof. I don't mind the washing and drying. It is just finding the RIGHT brand and style that meets my baby's needs while not breaking the bank while trying to FIND that brand. Help!!!! I wish wish wish I could have just gotten 1 of each brand of AIOs and tried them on my baby and then bought accordingly. I am still waiting for my Berry Plush's and my Bum Genius 2.0 to come. After that I will decide definitely what to keep and what to resell. 

I think I have decided wool covers will be the best for Michigan in the winter but they are SO expensive!!! OMG!!!! I feel like pulling my hair out!!!!!

 

I would so anything for a $1000 right now!

Money Hoards AKA CEO Oil Tycoons

Okay so I hear on the news today that the national average is about $3.15 per gallon for the low grade 87 gas .... We just hit $3.49 here in Michigan -- at the cheap place. How can that be when Diesil is still in the $2.89 range? I know it is different, but COME ON!!!

Are you FREAKING kidding me????

 Is this like a bad joke or something?

Am I the ONLY one that thinks SOME ONE, SOME WHERE needs to do something about this? It is bordering on ridiculous! In fact, if it weren't so pathetic, it would be funny.

It is like "how high can we raise the prices, pad our pockets and take, take, take, leaving the lower middle class and below near impoverished before the dumb asses will stand up and do something???" I can see the meeting now... I don't believe for ONE second that the prices need to be this high. People keep referencing the late 70's -- early 80's and this is FAR beyond how bad it was then!

Where is the moral responsibility of the CEO oil tycoons? All I know is that Carma is a bitch and you get what you give....

I hear the latest spike is b/c of insufficient production in the UNITED STATES refineries. Okay where is my puking smiley???

This type of gouging should be illegal!

JMHO of course

What is Normalcy... I mean really???

What is normalcy??? I mean really?

So someone recently asked me if my life would ever get back to normal. I thought to myself "Self? Will it ever get back to normal? And if it does ever get back to normal, what will that really mean? What would I do with a normal life? I think I would be bored... "

Normal is over rated....

Normal seems to me to have 3 kids running a muck through the house, playing yelling, laughing, deciding to wear every spider man/superman/batman piece of clothing they own through out the day.... There by NEVER having an epty laundry basket in the house indicating that all the laundry is washed, folded, and put away... all at the same tme. In fact, I don't even remember what that is like.... Where did the laundry fairy go and why hasn't she been back since the day I turned 13???

Normal is trying to cook dinner with a  baby on my hip, pot boiling over b/c apparently I can not pour chocolate milk fast enough. Setting the table with paper plates b/c I have yet to hav a second to unpack any plates except the small bread plates.

Normal is having a baby attached to my boob while standing at the back door trying to keep my dogs from getting out of the fence while my three year old -- oh wait -- my four year old tries to convince the dog, Milo,  that is bigger than him, to play "chase" and Milo is it! God forbid my little piranah slips off the boob -- he does have 6 teeth now and has learned the art of grabbing the bra strap to plung himself back on!

Normal is getting 50 feet from my house in the car -- not even to the stop sign -- and turning around in my neighbors drive way to come back b/c one of the kids "HAS TO GO POTTY!!!!!!" even though we just went before we left the house...

Normal is doing weekend homework -- you know , the stuff the 10 year old didn't have any of -- on a Sunday night at 10pm in 3 different subjects b/c Mom forgot to rifle through the recycling bin ... I mean book bag .... Friday afternoon.

Okay so I am ovulating now... Normal would be seducing my husband, having a romantic evening after the kiddos are in bed. Hell, I would settle for simple "wham bam, thank you mam" sex tonight. HAH! Sex??? You have GOT to be kidding me!!! I haven't even gotten to take my shower today yet! Maybe this is natures way of preventing pregnancy until things calm down just enough in order to have sex again, the youngest gets a little bit older, and BAMB back to babyhood.... HAH!

Don't get me wrong. I LOVE my life. I LOVE the Chaos. I LOVE the organized debacle I refer to as home. I LOVE quick "quickies" in the shower so we can BOTH kill to birds with one stone...

However, I could NEVER imagine a "Normal" Life...... Not only could I not imagine a normal life, but I don't think I would even like it very much.... What would I do with all my free time???

Coupons Coupons Coupons......

Okay, so it BLOWS my mind that people will not only auction off gift cards or coupons and people will actually bid on them for almost exactly what they are worth??????

Example.... $400 Best buy gift card -- there are a few of them listed right now. They either have a BIN of $385 OR are bid up to almost $400... Does that defeat the purpose???? I will never understand it.... Then you have the guy who is charging $19.99 for a mystery gift card worth $500 -- ummmmmmmm can we say circumventing????? GEEZ.....

Okay, off I go to find some reasonable best buy and or circuit city coupons.... BLAH!!!! !


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